


Book Report Erotica (Part 5 in The Prank War Series)

by Black_Pannther



Series: Prank Wars [5]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, Gen, Humor, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-28
Updated: 2016-08-28
Packaged: 2018-08-11 11:26:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7889863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Black_Pannther/pseuds/Black_Pannther
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John enlists both boys to go on a hunt with him causing Sam not to have the time to do his boor report so Dean offers to help him. Could this be a good thing?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

John made the announcement that the next hunt he is going on, he will need both of his sons. Dean was the obedient soldier as usual which irritated Sam immensely. “Dad…. I can’t, Sam protested. “I have to finish this book because I have to write a book report on it. I have to have it in by next Friday.”

“Don’t worry Sam.” Their father said. “I’ll have you home in time for your book report.”

“Yea, but I won’t have it done.” Sam argued.

“YOU’RE GOING AND THAT’S FINAL. NO MORE ARGUMENTS. THE NEXT WORDS I WANT TO HEAR COMING OUT OF YOUR MOUTH IS YES SIR. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR? John yelled.

“YES SIR.” Came Sam’s sarcastic reply followed by a solute.

“GOOD NOW GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. WE LEAVE BY SUN DOWN.” Without waiting for response from either of his sons, John started loading up the impala.

“Sam, why must you always fight with dad?” Asked Dean.

“Because I really do have a book report due by next Friday.” Explained Sam. “I don’t want to get an F on it.”

Dean rolled his eyes. “You are definatly a first class geek. You know that?”

Sam only zipped up his gray duffle bag in response, tossing it over his shoulder, he headed out the door.

The hunt didn’t go as easily as the three of them suspected, mistakes were made, all three of them got tossed around like they were nothing but rag dolls by what ever the hell that was, they couldn’t describe it, John didn’t even know if this thing had a name.

Sam accidentally shot their father in the ass with rock salt and then blamed Dean, getting his older brother in plenty of hot water.

“Why’d the hell did you tell dad that it was me that shot him in the ass with rock salt when it was you who did it?” Asked Dean in disbelief as he was cleaning all the goo and blood off of all their weapons and polishing them.

“Because although it was an accident,” Explained Sam. “Consider this my prank on you.”

“Okay, number one,” Stated Dean. “I told you that I get a do over oh alien child. And number two, I hate to break it to you but the truth is….. You’re adopted. Dad never wanted me to tell you for the fear that you would go looking for your biological parents. They left you on our door step when you were a baby.”

Sam’s eyes filled with tears as he started to howl. Dean’s eyes grew big for the fear their dad would hear, he jumped off the bed, holding his hands in front of him in complete surender. “Okay…. Okay…., I’m sorry. I was only kidding. You’re not adopted.”

Sam looked up expectantly. “Really?” He sniffled.

“Yea, really.” Answered Dean. “I only said that to get back at you. I won’t do it again, I promise.”

The next day, they headed for home. Thursday night they arrived at the cabin. Sam was trying to read the rest of his book, Moby Dick.

Dean saw his little brother in his room, completely engrossed in the book.


	2. Chapter 2

“Thanks to dad, I never got the chance to finish this book or do my book report and it’s due tomorrow so I’m stuck pulling an all nighter.”

“You’re a growing boy, you need your rest. I’ll tell you what, I write your book report for you.”

“Yea right.” Came Sam’s retort. “You write a book report? What do you know about Moby Dick?”

“You know Sammy, I’m not as stupid as you think I am.” Dean responded not hiding the fake hurt in his eyes. “I have read the book twice and I’ve seen the movie six times.”

“You think you could help me?” Asked Sam.

“That’s what big brother’s are for.” Then Dean grabbed the book, spiral notebook and ink pen off of Sam’s bed. “Now, you go ahead and get some sleep. I’ll have this done for you by morning. I promise.”

Sam sighed in relief. “Thanks Dean.”

“No problem bro.” And with that, Dean was off in his own room writing Sam’s book report snickering as he imagined Sam reading that book report out loud in front of the whole class. Dean began with, MOBY’S DICK. Starring Moby as the cabin boy and Captain Ahab as the seductively beautiful woman that seduces Moby into having sex with her.

The next morning Sam awoke finding his book report lying next to his head. He went into Dean’s room to thank him but found his exhausted big brother to be sleeping. ‘Oh well.’ Thought Sam. ‘I’ll just tell him later.’ 

Sam went into the kitchen where he found their father sitting at the kitchen table reading a newspaper and sipping a cup of coffee. Sitting across the table from him was a nice, steaming bowl. “Hey scout.” Greeted John as he looked up from the paper. “I made you a bowl of oatmeal.” 

Sam quietly sat down and started eating his oatmeal. He grimaced over the bitter taste and went into the cupboard to fetch the brown sugar. There wasn’t much in the bag but it was enough to offer his plain oatmeal some flavor. “Go easy on that scout.” His father gently warned him. “I need to drop by the store and get some more.”

“Okay dad.” Agreed Sam. “Who’s taking me to school today? Dean’s asleep.”

“Yea, he exhausted from the hunt. I’m surprised you’re not, I could call the school and get you excused for today.” John offered.

“No thanks dad. My book report is due today and I wanna turn it in so that I can get an A.”

“Alright then, hurry up and finish your breakfast. I’m drivin’ you to school.”

Sitting in class, Sam waited until his name was called to read his book report on Moby Dick. He sauntered proudly into the front of the class. And he took out his neatly written book report and he began.

“Moby was a lowly cabin boy who worked for the beautiful and seductive Captain Ahab. She would send the other cabin boys to different chores and she would assign Moby to serve her in every sexual way. What made Moby so special? He had an average look, an average build. There was nothing different about him to make him stand apart from the other cabin boys, nothing except the size of his dick. It was the size of a whale or close to it. While the others had to do hated chores on the deck for only a few sheckles a month, Moby was her sex slave. He never complained because he was in love with Captain Ahab and she was only in love with his whale sized dick.”

On and on, Sam read his erotic book report called Moby’s Dick. He described Captain Ahab’s and Moby’s bodies in a language that would make the pope blush. He described their sexual escapades leaving the boys in the class panting like dogs in heat. The girls were chuckling in embarrassment “ALRIGHT SAM, NOW THAT’S ENOUGH!” Boomed the teacher.

“But I haven’t finished reading my book report.” Whined Sam.


	3. Chapter 3

“Ah, come on.” Yelled a boy from the back. “He was just getting to the good parts.” The rest of the class chuckled.

“CLASS, NOW SETTLE DOWN.” Threatened the teacher. “Sam, I want you to go to the office and bring your book report with you.”

With his head bowed down, Sam shuffled down to the office. He didn’t understand what had happened. He only read his book report to the class like he was instructed to. Hell, he didn’t even know what half of those words meant so why is he in trouble?

Once in the principal’s office, Sam handed the secretary his book report and she told him to have a seat until he was called. After what seemed like an eternity, he saw two boys leave the principal’s office, one with a black eye and one with a bloody nose and both are in tears. “Debbie.” instructed the principal. “Call the boys’ parents. Explain to them the no tolerance policy we have on fighting.” The secretary picked up the phone and started dialing the numbers in response.

“Sam Winchester.” Called the principal. Smirking, the secretary handed Sam back his book report. Sam followed the principal slowly into his office.

The principal sat down and gestured that Sam should do the same. He opened up his file and shook his head in disbelief.

“Sam, our records show that you have been on the honor roll since you were in the 1st grade. Your grades are outstanding so what’s changed?”

Sam handed the principal his book report on Moby’s Dick. The principal read it and looked at Sam confused.

“I’m not following.” The Principal admitted.  
“It was my book report on Moby Dick.” Said Sam. “I read it in front of the whole class.”

“The title says Moby’s Dick not Moby Dick…. I don’t get it Sam, you are one of the best if not the best student in this school. What ever possessed you to write this smut? Really Sam. You’re better than that so why’d you do it?”

Sam knew he couldn’t tell him the truth because that would lead into him telling him about the things they hunt and hell would break loose on their family so all he could do was shrug his shoulders and say, “I don’t know, I thought it would be funny.”

“Well, I don’t see any humor in what you’ve done. I’m very disappointed in you. Is there anyone at home I can call to pick you up?”

Sam looked up terrified. He didn’t want to get sent home from school. It was his only refuge. The only place he could go where he truly felt like he was normal. “Yes.” He mumbled. “My brother, Dean.”

The Principal picked up the phone and started dialing. “Hi, is this Dean Winchester?” Asked the Principal to the voice on the other line. “Yes, we need you to come and pick up Sam. He is not to return until I speak to Mr. Winchester himself. Okay, see you in a few.” 

“I am writing your father a letter and I want you to give it to him.” The Principal instructed as he quickly jotted down the reason for Sam’s suspension. “Here, now go into the waiting area until your brother comes to pick you up.”

Sam took the piece of paper from the principals hand and quietly went into the waiting area.

Five minutes later Dean arrives. “Hey Sammy, you juvenile delinquent. What kind of trouble have you gotten yourself into?” 

Sam scowled in response.

“Uh, Mr Winchester.” Interupted the secretary. “I need you to sign your brother out.” Dean quickly did so.

Sitting in the impala, Sam’s face was scrunched up in a brooding scowl that only made Dean laugh. “Awe, come on Sammy. It was only a joke.”

No response, just more scowling.

“You know, that is pay back for shooting dad in the ass with rock salt and telling him that I did it.”

“Yea, but you messed with my education and got me suspended.” Reminded angry Sam. “YOU’RE AN ASS.”

Dean only laughed more in response.

Sam stomped to his room slamming the door violently behind him, Shutting out Dean’s laughter.

An hour later their father got home from Bobby’s. ‘Mood check.’ thought Dean. He wanted to make sure that when he gave John the letter from Sam’s principal, their father wasn’t in a bad mood because usually, the punishment depended on what kind of mood he was in. 

John didn’t seem to be in a happy or bad mood. ‘Damn,’ thought Dean, too bad dad couldn’t win the lottery. That will make him go easy on us. Us? No, it was Sam’s book report, only he would get in trouble.’ Dean loved his little brother no matter what little heathen he was but he didn’t want the punishment on him to be harsh. That would only make him feel guilty.

Dean walked quietly into the kitchen and handed him Sam’s book report and the letter from the principal. “What’s this?” Asked their father confused.

“Just read it dad.” Answered Dean. “Sam’s in his room. I had to pick him up from school 2nd period.”

Dean saw the wrinkle start to crease their father’s forehead as he read the letter then, he started reading Sam’s book report on Moby’s Dick. His eye brows went up as his face became flushed. “Sam wrote this?” Without waiting for Dean to respond, “I…. I just don’t get it. This isn’t like Sam to write something like that.”

“Well,” Said Dean. “I’ve read it and it shows that he can be a good writer for pent house forum.”

John gave Dean a look of reprimand.


	4. Chapter 4

“SAM, GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE RIGHT THIS INSTANT!” Boomed John.

Sam shuffled from his room into the living room where their father was holding the letter and his report fuming. Dean was standing behind him smirking. Oh how Sam would like to smack that smirk right off of his brother’s face.

“WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?” Yelled John shaking the papers in Sam’s face.

Sam only looked down in response.

“OKAY, ANOTHER QUESTION. WHAT IN THE HELL POSSESSED YOU TO WRITE SUCH GARBAGE?” John continued.

“What I wouldn’t call it garbage.” Snickered Dean. “He’s actually good at it.”

“DEAN, NOT NOW,” Yelled John. “THIS IS SERIOUS, NOW KEEP YOUR SMARTASS COMENTS TO YOURSELF.”

Sam thought about it before answering the question. He could tell their father that Dean wrote it but what good will it do? He already got a black mark on his record. “I….. I was just trying to be funny.” Came Sam’s week response.

“OH YEA, IT’S REALLY FUCKING HILARIOUS. I’M LAUGHING MY GOD DAMN ASS OFF. WOW SAM, YOU SHOULD GIVE UP BEING A HUNTER AND JUST BECOME A COMEDIAN. FOR YOUR REWARD FOR SUCH A GREAT HILARIOUS STORY THAT GOT YOU SUSPENDED. YOU’RE GROUNDED. ARE YOU LAUGHING NOW FUNNY MAN BECAUSE RIGHT NOW I’M IN FUCKING STITCHES. HA, HA,HA, HA, GO TO YOUR ROOM, HA, HA, HA, HA, AND TOMORROW WE ARE GOING TO GO TO YOUR SCHOOL, I WILL HAVE A TALK WITH YOUR PRINCIPAL AND GET YOU BACK IN SCHOOL. WE CAN’T AFFORD ON HAVING A TRUANT OFFICER OUT HERE. NOW, LEAVE MY SIGHT BEFORE I REALLY GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO LAUGH ABOUT.”

Dean didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Laugh because his dad looked funny as hell mocking Sam, cry because poor Sammy looked defeated. Dean decided to take the higher road.

After their dad decided to angrily tinker in the garage, Dean sneaked into Sam’s room. 

Hearing his door open and then close quietly, Sam turned his red rimmed eyes towards Dean. “What do you want?” Asked Sam between sniffles.

The look on his poor brother’s face made Dean’s heart wrench. “I’m here to apologize.” Explained Dean. “I feel badly about what I did.”

“You feel badly for what YOU did? That’s a twist.” Sam sarcastically responded.

“Wow, dad’s right. You should be a comedian.”

“Eat Me.” Came Sam’s angry retort.

“Listen Sammy. I really am sorry. If it’s any consolation, dad has to sit on a hemroid donut because of you shooting him in the ass with rock salt.”

“That was an accident.”

“Yes but it was still funny and think about the pleasure it gave you to blame me and how dad got mad at me for it.”

Sam begun to smile. “Yea, I guess that was funny.”

“Yes and the stupid things dad was saying out there in the living room when he called you a funny man. I mean come on, you have to laugh about that.”

“Well, I would have thought it was too busy receiving my punishment.” 

If you were standing where I was, you’d be laughing your ass off. Come on Sammy, what do you say truce?” 

Sam reached out to take Dean’s hand. “Truce.” He replied as they shook hands. Sam ended it with a big I FORGIVE YOU GRIN when in truth, he was plotting something deliciously evil for his big brother. Oh yea, he is going to pay.


End file.
